I told myself when I hit 250lbs (almost 70lbs lost) that I would do the Insanity workout program. I knew it was hard, but didn’t really know how hard it was going to be.
I hit 250lbs, then 249…248….247….246, and I still hadn’t started Insanity. What was I doing? Well, a friend of mine said, “you’re scared Tracy, just do it”. That got me. I was scared. Why? Because starting Insanity was the HARDEST workout program I have ever done in my life.
The first day of the program you do a Fit Test to determine how many of a certain move you can do for a minute. A minute. That can’t be that hard? WRONG. I got a big fat 0 on the push up jacks. And those are exactly what you think they are – push ups where you jack your legs out like a jumping jack on the ground.
But as I’ve somehow come to find in myself, I’m determined to finish. Determined to make it through every workout – 6 days a week. To prove to myself that I can do it. It doesn’t mean that I don’t stop and take a break halfway through a workout to catch my breath or make sure my heart doesn’t pound out of my chest, but I follow through with the full workout.
If you are looking for something to sculpt your body and push yourself to the max, then Insanity is for you!
Everyone always says you need motivation to lose weight. Well, that’s partially true. I had to have something to motivate me in the beginning, but it’s more determination and inspiration that get me through day by day.
An internet weight loss buddy of mine thanks to the subreddit r/loseit and MyFitnessPal always says, “motivation is an emotion, it comes and goes”. It really is true.
Determination is key. I’m determined now to make it through the Insanity program. I was determined to run 5K and I did it. I was determined to shed a few minutes off my run time and run under a 10min mile and I did it. I was determined to be able to hold a plank for 20sec and I did it. I AM DETERMINED to make it to my 50% weight loss goal. I don’t need motivation every day – now it’s sheer determination and stubbornness to prove it to myself that I can do whatever I set my mind to.
Inspiration is something else that has helped me every day. Every day I get on r/loseit and MyFitnessPal (add me as a friend – username is libelluler) and see the amazing success stories. People just like me who figured it out and did it and got to their goal. Whether it was 200lbs they had to lose or only 20lbs, they figured it and did it. Each and every one of those people inspire me to keep going.
In a discussion on r/loseit, people were talking about what is something that someone said that kept you going and this really rang true for me:
I remember that I don’t have a choice anymore, because living my life in a shitty body is no longer an option for me. I remember that I want to be an example to other people, that anyone can defeat obesity and morbid obesity. Anyone can find out that they are worth more than they ever imagined, that we are each the most precious gift anyone else has ever seen.
I reached a HUGE goal today! HUGE! I made it to the 50% mark of my weight loss goal. This has been a goal that has been just within my reach over the last few weeks, but after stalling out I felt I would never get here.
In 8 months, I have lost 71 lbs. 71! Yes, I know, it is not an even number, but to get to 175 from 317, 71lbs is 50% of the way.
Whenever I have started a “diet” before I was always excluding so many of the things I ate AND all at once. Without fail I would end up hungry, cranky and mad.
This time around, making smart choices has been another lesson I have learned. I LOVE food. Seriously cannot emphasize LOVE enough. But, with my smarter choices and becoming healthy, I still eat the things I love but either in smaller quantities or as a treat. Also, my tastes have changed. I find with the exercises I’m doing and while trying to find ways to maximize quality of food for calories, I am eating differently.
The one thing I have excluded completely is pop. And, I think it’s one of the best decisions I made. Being a southern/midwest girl and living in Oklahoma and Texas for most of my childhood there was one pop I loved more than anything….Dr. Pepper. But, becoming the healthy person I want to be made me realize that I had to give it up. So, I started slowly. I know some people are “all or nothing” types, but that is NOT me. I have to learn to be without something. I started going from 1 a day to 1 every other day to 1 a week and finally none at all. Over 3 months to remove it completely from my diet, but it made it so much easier.
I can run! In my quest to get healthy I relearned the lesson drilled into me by my elementary school gym teacher of “Never Say You Can’t Do Something”!
I came upon the Couch to 5K program in early October. I highly recommend this program to anyone who generally wants to incorporate exercise into their life and especially if you want to learn to run. I started off with great enthusiasm, but Day 1 was rough. I could barely run the 1 minute spurts in between 5 minute walks. Even my walks were slow. But my determination didn’t falter. (And honestly I don’t know where this focused determination came from some days) If I couldn’t do one day all the way through, I just kept going, redoing days and pushing through. I started waking my butt up early in the morning to get my “runs” in.
Finally in January I made it through the program and to that goal of being able to run 5K! Seroiusly one of the best days so far in this journey. In March I signed up for the Shamrock Shuffle 3K and ran it with a colleague in 22:01!
I continue to push myself in my forms of exercise and you won’t find me saying that I CAN’T do something agian!
Mike keeps telling me…um..reminding me that I need to blog more (since this is the blog of Mike AND Tracy). So, one of the things that is central to my life is the journey I am on to lose weight and get healthy.
A little background first. I’ve always been a “big” girl for most of my adult life – 16+ years and on. In high school I thought I was HUGE, but I wasn’t. I wore a 14/16 around this time which a year ago didn’t even seem like an attainable size to me. I hovered around 200lbs and stayed there through most of college, but then my depression and anxiety got the best of me and I let it take me away to happy food coma land and the weight started to pile on.
Skip ahead to a little over 3 years ago. I was at 300+ lbs and I got pregnant. I was thrilled, but I was pregnant AND 310 (give or take a few) lbs! My doctor told me I was in the “high risk” category for pregnancy because of my weight and my heart sank, but I didn’t have any problems the entire time and had a happy, healthy little girl. After losing the “baby weight” (30 more lbs) I stood at 315 – 320 lbs and I stayed there.
Then, around August 2012 I started “thinking” about “starting” to get healthy as I had done many times before, but I wasn’t really serious about it. I would work out here and there and maybe track my calories for half a day and stop. We went on vacation in September and I pigged out. When we got home I weighed in at 317lbs! Now I started getting mad at myself and I got determined to do something.
September 24th changed it all though. I was at work and started getting this strange tingling in my chest. After awhile my anxiety kicked in and I actually started getting worried about it. I went home after work, kept feeling this weird feeling in my chest and finally went to Urgent Care. An ambulance ride later and who knows how much blood and whatever tests later I was NOT having a heart attack, but I had one MAJOR wake up call.
It makes me upset sometimes to think that it wasn’t getting pregnant, it wasn’t having a kid, or it wasn’t weighing in at a whopping 317lbs that made me get off my ass, but thinking I was having a heart attack that did. But, it was MY wake up call. I want to be healthy for my family and for myself.
And that’s one of the biggest lessons I have learned so far…I have to think about MYSELF to be able to be healthy for my family.